I was about ten years old in the early ‘80’s when my father was a student pastor in East Orange, NJ. The church where he served rented out space to a church that ministered with people who were gay. Men in the church began dying from what was known at the time as “gay cancer.” As traumatic as the disease was, the fearful response of church and society created even more isolation, stigma, and shame.

My parents immediately stepped in to minister with those who had been abandoned by a society who feared this disease. At a time when people were terrified of touching anyone who had AIDS, my parents welcomed friends into our home, offered hugged, and journeyed alongside throughout the death and dying process (at that time, most people didn’t live long with AIDS).

My parents’ work also went beyond direct ministry and focused on changing the systems that were treating people who had HIV/AIDS unfairly. My father helped NJ United Methodist churches address issues around HIV/AIDS and my mother worked with organizations like Gay Men’s Health Crisis.

My parents’ ministry was such a lesson for me in what it means to live out our faith. It helped give me a voice as I entered high school and was able to correct others’ misinformation about HIV/AIDS. My parents taught me to look beyond the status quo and see the fullness of humanity in my siblings in the world. They also taught me that ministry is not about me – it is about the people we are in ministry with. My parents recognized the courage, strength, and sacred worth of the people they journeyed with. They helped bring the representation of God into the lives of the people they touched.